Hi, I have made a Chinese friend at university and I have been invited to his for a meal, at his UK address. I have researched Chinese etiquette and have come up with the list (displayed at the bottom of the message) from [www.chinese-tools.com].

I was wondering what you guys thought were the main points, if you have any points of your own, and if you had any idea of what kind of present I would bring.

Thank you

. The Chinese prefer to entertain in public places rather than in their homes, especially when entertaining foreigners.
. If you are invited to their house, consider it a great honour. If you must turn down such an honour, it is considered polite to explain the conflict in your schedule so that your actions are not taken as a slight.
. Arrive on time.
. Remove your shoes before entering the house.
. Bring a small gift to the hostess.
. Eat well to demonstrate that you are enjoying the food!
Table manners:
. Learn to use chopsticks.
. Wait to be told where to sit. The guest of honour will be given a seat facing the door.
. The host begins eating first.
. You should try everything that is offered to you.
. Never eat the last piece from the serving tray.
. Be observant to other peoples' needs.
. Chopsticks should be returned to the chopstick rest after every few bites and when you drink or stop to speak.
. The host offers the first toast.
. Do not put bones in your bowl. Place them on the table or in a special bowl for that purpose.
. Hold the rice bowl close to your mouth while eating.
. Do not be offended if a Chinese person makes slurping or belching sounds; it merely indicates that they are enjoying their food.
. There are no strict rules about finishing all the food in your bowl.

. The Chinese prefer to entertain in public places rather than in their homes, especially when entertaining foreigners.
. If you are invited to their house, consider it a great honour. If you must turn down such an honour, it is considered polite to explain the conflict in your schedule so that your actions are not taken as a slight.
. Arrive on time.
. Remove your shoes before entering the house.
. Bring a small gift to the hostess.
. Eat well to demonstrate that you are enjoying the food!
Table manners:
. Learn to use chopsticks. - This is a must if you eat with Chinese people, unless they also prefer to use knives and forks. Usually, when eating with guests, a set of chopsticks is used to put the food into each bowl / plate, so that it will be more sanitary.
. Wait to be told where to sit - this is only if there's a really big table and the people have a big dining room table, otherwise, this could be avoided. The guest of honour will be given a seat facing the door. - This only happens if the host / hostess have a big dining room table, otherwise, this could be avoided.

. The host begins eating first.- Not really. The host will offer the guest to eat first, but in return as a term of respect, the guest should reciprocate. Either can eat first, unless the host doesn't say anything or make any gestures, then he/she might eat first, since it is their house.
. You should try everything that is offered to you. Well, try a tiny bit of everything offered and see which you like. Chinese people, as etiquette goes, doesn't like leaving anything in the bowl, you must empty it out, signifying that you are satisfied with the host's hospitality.
. Never eat the last piece from the serving tray. - This is only if you are in a restaurant or a place where food is served to you.
. Be observant to other peoples' needs.
. Chopsticks should be returned to the chopstick rest after every few bites and when you drink or stop to speak. - This is only when in a restaurant setting.
. The host offers the first toast. - If they offers it, otherwise, you can try to toast first, if you just politely tell your host that you will do so.
. Do not put bones in your bowl. Place them on the table or in a special bowl for that purpose. - Put bones outside the bowl: either on the table, on a piece of paper which is of no use, on a napkin which might be thrown out as trash, on a separate bowl or plate, or just take them to the trash receptacle / bin, etc...
. Hold the rice bowl close to your mouth while eating. - so the food won't spill out and become a waste. Chinese people saves everything from becoming waste as much as possible, especially food.
. Do not be offended if a Chinese person makes slurping or belching sounds; it merely indicates that they are enjoying their food. The more modernized and more educated a Chinese is, the less belching and slurping he / she makes and should be apologizing for such 'rude' behavior.
. There are no strict rules about finishing all the food in your bowl. - If you can't finish it, that's because you're full, not because you're not respectful.

Yes, those are what most Chinese people will follow. There are certain things you better not to give to the hostess: No clock, no green hat, don't give four of same things ( four is a bad number in Chinese culture). The universal rule applies here -- smile as brightly as you can

Make sure you finish all the rice in the bowl you're given... but you shouldn't finish all the other food on the table. I get the idea that this has something to do with respecting the person who farmed all those little grains of rice.

From my experience, the person who made the food (usually the mother) will continue to feed you and feed you until you burst at the seams. It kinda contradicts British polite culture where we'll keep polite and just saying 'yes please' every time we're offered more food (even if we're bursting). So it makes sense to start showing signs of being full when you're only at about 70%. Also note that every time you finish your drink it will be filled up again... so leave a bit over if you've really finished and don't want to drink anymore.

Chocolates are a good gift.... or fresh fruit like a box of cherries. (Not oranges unless it is Chinese New Year.... that would be a bit strange). If you're gonna give a bottle of Alcohol to them be prepared to explain everything about it.


Oh yeah... and relax

Oh My God

When I got invited to a lady's house in China I did it all the wrong way, no wonder I was never invited back! Wish you could have posted this earlier?

Mikhl Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hi, I have made a Chinese friend at university and
> I have been invited to his for a meal, at his UK
> address. I have researched Chinese etiquette and
> have come up with the list (displayed at the
> bottom of the message) from
> [www.chinese-tools.com].
>
> I was wondering what you guys thought were the
> main points, if you have any points of your own,
> and if you had any idea of what kind of present I
> would bring.
>
> Thank you
>
> . The Chinese prefer to entertain in public places
> rather than in their homes, especially when
> entertaining foreigners.
> . If you are invited to their house, consider it a
> great honour. If you must turn down such an
> honour, it is considered polite to explain the
> conflict in your schedule so that your actions are
> not taken as a slight.
> . Arrive on time.
> . Remove your shoes before entering the house.
> . Bring a small gift to the hostess.
> . Eat well to demonstrate that you are enjoying
> the food!
> Table manners:
> . Learn to use chopsticks.
> . Wait to be told where to sit. The guest of
> honour will be given a seat facing the door.
> . The host begins eating first.
> . You should try everything that is offered to
> you.
> . Never eat the last piece from the serving tray.
> . Be observant to other peoples' needs.
> . Chopsticks should be returned to the chopstick
> rest after every few bites and when you drink or
> stop to speak.
> . The host offers the first toast.
> . Do not put bones in your bowl. Place them on the
> table or in a special bowl for that purpose.
> . Hold the rice bowl close to your mouth while
> eating.
> . Do not be offended if a Chinese person makes
> slurping or belching sounds; it merely indicates
> that they are enjoying their food.
> . There are no strict rules about finishing all
> the food in your bowl.

I've been enjoying my time at china for first time in my life

I am eager for exploring Chinese great culture and history. It is extremely difficult for me to have enough money and opportunity to visit Beijing and the Great Wall. I hope someone will give me a chance,