Re: Help me with my book... plz.
Posted by: Cureyourheart
Date: April 01, 2015 10:14AM
Hello, there. How are you?
First of all, I would like to introduce myself before I start.
I am a Chinese, if you like you could address me "Frank".
I read your post and I totally understand your the problem which you are facing.
In fact, I found it difficult on naming my foreign characters and writing their speech like you sometimes. What I am going to say is please feel free to ask me questions. I would like to give you a hand on your writings.
Okay, let's move on our topic. Question 1
Well, to talk about the names of your characters. Don't worry, They are great. Haha.
Um, talking about the name of their mother Feng JiaLi 丰佳李. To speck frankly,"Feng 丰" is not a popular family name in China(At least, I have never heard it.)but I am not saying that it does not exist, I have already checked it. On the other hand, if there have three words in our names, we usually separate them individually in English form as Feng Jia Li for exmaple. Overall, you did a great job and I really like your story background. A story which was happening in refugee camp, I believe that would be a extremely touchable story. To be honest, I am really looking forward to read more about it.
Move on Question 2,
Well, don't worry. You can writing anything you want. You know, Love is something that exist when human being have created by God or whatever at the beginning, thus there has no difference between any races, I believe. No offensive, it is my opinion. I beg your pardon if my words were offensive, I don't mean to do this.
Alright, if I am the boy( Have I already been falling in love with her at the first meeting?) Okay, I choose yes. I think I would treat her like my younger sister and no matter I finally found out that she was older than me. I wouldn't change my mind because I was younger than her. Of course, I would get shock when I knew it but the gap of age is not a problem for me. Moreover, when we are going to protect someone who we love, there has nothing will change our mind. Age is just a number, it means nothing in relationship. However, the parents of boy might mind about the girl age. You know, some traditional old Chinese people don't like their son having a relationship with a older girl. So, it depends on his parents, are they open-mind or not?
It is hard to say because I don't know when did the story start. Um, don't worry, please feel free develop your character.
He could be a bad boy, a nice boy, or a boy who was bad until he has met her even. In my experience, Chinese playas could do everything badly like normal playas over the world. If he is quite good looking, then I believe he has kissed somebody. To talk About more than kiss, if he was a good teenage boy, he wouldn't not do anything more than kiss and hug because he would thought about the feeling of the girls and their future. I don't think a good 18 years old teenage boy would do more than that, it is my opinion. No, he wouldn't consider that it was embarrassing with a girl alone nowadays. Yes, if it happened in old China though.
"is it common that couples are intimate with someone before marriage?" In old China, yes. At present China, no. It's quite huge difference between present China and old China, so setting a right age of the story is very important.
Well done, I like the names of those space ships. Don't worry about the names of the space ships. Tao yuan is a gorgeous name. Hang tian which means flying on space. "Hangtansuo" um, I couldn't say it is wrong. In my opinion, "Hang tian tan suo zhe" would be better than "Hangtansuo" as the meaning of space explorer.
Wow, it sounds interesting that they travel somewhere with a spaceship. I am confusing on the story background. A refugee camp and space ships. I guess it is a story which is happening in future? Are they living in earth? Is it the planet abandoned by human being? Are they like the Adam and Eve who save the earth or something? Sorry, I am starting to make the story. Hahaha. I hope I could read more about your story.
Please feel free to answer me questions, if there's anything I can help.
Have a nice day.