Hi,

I know a few chinese people (3 or 4 are girls). There is one that contacted me and I am particulary interested in her. My friend from Shanghai told me to go easy with chinese girls and I listen to her. I am interested in opinion, if we have good time together, if she calls me in the middle of the night with a problem that is making her cry, it est she is seeking comfort and she didn't go to speak with other people but she told me...

What do you think my action should be further, to go slowly and try to raise our "relation" to next step or to define it as a friend relation? Sorry, I am so confused and would appreciate a word of advice.

Thank you in advance.

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/26/2009 09:48PM by Olive.

so many chinese girls have foreign-worship.especially caucasian worship,plus they want get a developed nation's citizenship through marry with foriegners,be careful swindlers.

If you want it to be a girlfriend relationship just let her know and see what happens. If she doesn't want it you can probably still be friends anyway so no problem.

Not all Chinese girls are so traditional and conservative that you need to go extra slow. Depends A LOT on the girl. If she's calling you in the middle of the night to talk about problems she's obviously trusting you a lot and relying on you which probably means she'll be cool with the relationship upgrade I'd say.

yes, that's right, i tried to find some conservative girls this Jan when I visited Shenzhen, no luck yo... they think i dress like a hick and refused to buy girls drink means i am cheap............

You know what? even in Canada, girls probably seldom ask guys to purchase them drinks even just talk like 2 min.....i was quite culture shock.

Canuck Wrote:
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> yes, that's right, i tried to find some
> conservative girls this Jan when I visited
> Shenzhen, no luck yo... they think i dress like a
> hick and refused to buy girls drink means i am
> cheap............

Than they definitely weren't conservative Chinese girls. Conservative girls here aren't so worried about fashion and don't hang out in Bars usually haha. From what you said before the girls you met were typical bar girls... best to stay away from them anyway!

The next time when she call you in the night,just ask her out and make some progress

I think you can comfort her first,then when she becomes well,you can ask the reason why she felt not happy,maybe she thought you are really a nice guy or maybe she wants to be next step,hehe

Thank you for advices. I will go further and easy clear the situation with her, actually I have begun that a step by step.

Thanks again. :-)

Vjuricic write ------------
. . . calls me in the middle of the night with a problem that is making her cry, it est she is seeking comfort . . .

Think farther: If you get into a relationship, will "listen to her problem" all day long drive you crazy?

Oh man, Follow the call of your instinct.

You know what I'm talking about

I know. I listened my instincts and told her. Now we are both in a mess, undecided, confused. Tomorrow we'll talk. I think she likes me, otherwise she wouldn't react like she has. Vice versa for me. I must take it slowly now, at her rythm, till now I wanted her to know what are my feelings, now when she knows, if she wants slowly, it will be like that.

tell how we gotta cut the BS, she can take it in her own way or hwy...maybe she just wanna attention, then we give her attention...lol..

Chairman Mao's quote, i watched it today on History channel.

"天要下雨，娘要嫁人'
the sky is bound to rain, a widow is bound to remarry; don't hinder him

Follow your gut instinct.

She obviously likes you or wants something or she wouldn't be calling, be careful, there are some great 'actors' out there.

Good luck

I appreciate all advices. But I wonder, she said she is confused and will have to decide, because she is traditionaly.minded girl, and it last 3-4 days for now. Of course, I asked her and she said, I need to think, really, we need time to know each other. Ok, if she wants to know me better, and me her, I am for that, but why she doesn't confirm it with one word, like Yes...

Because she's confused and probably doesnt have much experience with relationships let alone relationships with foreigners. Plus she's probably been told by many people how foreigners just want sex and are bad and cheat at relationships. Just give her time. Really. A week or two could be needed. If it goes longer than that you need to decide how much time you want to wait. Many fish in the sea and all that.

Uberche Wrote:
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> Because she's confused and probably doesnt have
> much experience with relationships let alone
> relationships with foreigners. Plus she's probably
> been told by many people how foreigners just want
> sex and are bad and cheat at relationships. Just
> give her time. Really. A week or two could be
> needed. If it goes longer than that you need to
> decide how much time you want to wait. Many fish
> in the sea and all that.


I know. I have given her some time, and will give her some more. I think she has started to open slowly, but my impression is it will go slowly. I respect her and really do not want to mess it. I will not force anything, but from time to time will ask her. For now my experience is very positive. :-)

Sometimes people just want to have someone else to talk and to discuss something because of loneliness or just for some help. But they may not choose to think about relationship too far. But at least the positive thing is she consider you as friend,,,,

nc
Nancy.Chen@www.pro-chinese-services.com

Nancyc Wrote:
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> Sometimes people just want to have someone else to
> talk and to discuss something because of
> loneliness or just for some help. But they may not
> choose to think about relationship too far. But at
> least the positive thing is she consider you as
> friend,,,,
>
> nc
> Nancy.Chen@www.pro-chinese-services.com

I agree. The time will tell.

Kurt Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> so many chinese girls have
> foreign-worship.especially caucasian worship,plus
> they want get a developed nation's citizenship
> through marry with foriegners,be careful
> swindlers.


Couldnt agree anymore... Chinese girls like Green card!!!