Hi All, I am a Chinese man living in the US but travel quite often to China. May I join the discussion? I am not sure why many Chinese men (or Chinese in general) are control-freaks. Maybe it is because of a strict household upbringing, and being in control in a relationship is a way to have some control over their own lives. In China, education is often one-sided, too little emphasis on personality development, hobbies, artistic expressions in general.

I believe Western women will be able to find Chinese men who are more open-minded in China, but it takes time, patience and constant education.

btw, lovebaozi, do you like the Chinese culture or the Chinese look more?

but i want to have a foreign girl friend(i am a chinese)

people are of no much difference in nature. Being sincere will move every one. I travel between the East and West. I don't a bridge which can NOT be gapped.

Just browse through few messages. I feel some people are extremism.

whenever I meet a foreign friends, and discuss about china/chinese. I would like to say "china is like a BIG sea, there are lots of fishes under the sea." Even for me, I am from Shanghai, but unfortunately, I also sometimes could hardly understand the mentality and behaviour of the countryside people or the people from the small village.

But, I think that is same to every country!

I have studied and worked in EU for more than 6 yrs. I also dated a dutch girl before, but, we broke up because she is too independent and agreesive. however, I also met some dutch girls who are very gentle and graceful, but already occupied

Ron0197 come on we're not chickened I live in Perth and I do have a few close white female friends. And I dont think they see me chickened. So dont worry about you missed chances to date white girls. If you finally realised it wouldnt work out between you both why not just be freinds.

And asian guys are not all jealous or possesive Correct me if im wrong from my experience asians who grew up in asian and western countries are different due to cultural influences.

Edi2009 Wrote:
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> Ron0197 come on we're not chickened I live in
> Perth and I do have a few close white female
> friends. And I dont think they see me chickened.
> So dont worry about you missed chances to date
> white girls. If you finally realised it wouldnt
> work out between you both why not just be
> freinds.
>
> And asian guys are not all jealous or possesive
> Correct me if im wrong from my experience asians
> who grew up in asian and western countries are
> different due to cultural influences.

Yeah very different. Asian guys in Asia are often very possesive and Jealous. Asian guys who grew up abroad generally are the same as everyone else abroad.

this is a very interesting post. thx to Lovebaozi. Just want to write some of my own thoughts.

I am 100%chinese and never left the country before I came to europe. so you can call me very 'traditional'. In a small town in Germany, there is not too many Chiense and I met my ex. She is 'white', according to the classification of this forum. She is beautiful. But that's not what attracts me. She is creative, sensitive and often very mad( which is not usual in Chinese girls). That's the reason i fell in love with her. I brought her to see my family once and all my friends and relatives like her very much. So dont think culture is really a great barrier. Have to admit sometimes it is not very convenient cos we attracted more eyes on the street and shop assistants tried to skew us (for them white == rich). But that's doesnt matter. we were in love.

"How love is seen in China has always been a really interesting topic to me. But I don't know anyone in my same situation. Always and just heard about chinese girls with foreign guys."
To some extend, the mirco environment is very important. However, as long as the friends/relatives can accept that, you should not care 'how love is seen in China'. Who cares about China? you two are the whole world.