Good afternoon,

would somebody be so kind to translate me the following into English? I've got a slight idea but need some more accurate info for my research.

Thank you so much for your help!

Cheers

Elfi

草他妈 今天很饿 没早餐没午餐吃 我他妈在冰箱里翻箱倒柜终于找到他妈的一盒巧克力 然后我他妈的吃了 结果今天那群龟儿子还说那巧克力是从德国带过来的 不能吃的 我他妈的还说了一个对不起 老子交了240块日他吗的没早餐吃没午餐吃 还他妈的住在大山之中 我他妈的一个月做公交车就花他妈的60$左右还要忍受她和她儿子的大吵大闹 我日他妈 长得又丑又老 你他妈的还当素食主义者 唯一提供晚餐你他妈的每天晚上还吃他妈的素食 老子吃个球 要不是老子有怀旧情节 你赚个鸡巴的钱

That seems not very decent, and too long for me.

That's why I'd like it translated. I'm not going to use it. Sorry it's so long. Cannot separate it into sentences as I don't know where they stop